It's official. I have fallen below my personal minimum in my savings account. "How far?" asks a member of the audience. $100 I reply. "That's not that much," he yells. SHUT UP JACKASS IT'S NOT THE POINT. I WASN'T SUPPOSED TO SPEND THAT MONEY.

I should hire an accountant for the Pimps and Bitches Whorehouse budget. Well, the whole budget is me so... But I could write it off as a business expense.

Also you would you would think being Bitchmaster Chris of the Pimps and Bitches Whorehouse I would have seen some boobs years ago instead of on my 20th birthday. Oh well. Off to better things...

I had to write a speech about "Why I am Wonderful" I'm not wonderful. At least I think I'm not. It would be wonderful if some groovy chick I didn't know said I was wonderful and became my groovy chick. and I her groovy dude. Did you ever think that me saying I had to write a speech would lead to that? And did you think I would ever use groovy? You bet your ass you did. or something...

I would also like to add, that I am not a communist, I just vote like one. And I do not support slave labor. And I think that people on TV should talk more to me and less to you.