it's almost my birthday! another lonely birthday...

1:59 p.m., September 01, 2005

Right now I am...

FEELING: The current mood of centaurlord@yahoo.com at www.imood.com

EATING: nothing.

WEARING: Jeans and my ozzy shirt

HEARING: My loud ass computer fans

THINKING: I wish Suji would hurry and get here...

RIGHT NOW I AM:

Where do you want to go?

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Hello all. I am feeling better today than I have been lately. I am still very nervous about school. I start a week from today. I�m nervous because I just want to make sure I do well. I want to get my masters and then get a good job as a psychotherapist. I am still not sure if I want to go for the PsyD. or not right now. I think I just want the masters then move somewhere else for the PsyD. I think Portalnd area would be nice since I could apply to Pacific University again. I didn�t get accepted there since I didn�t have the experience that most people have when they enter into the PsyD program.

I had my orientation yesterday for my school. I was one the youngest people in the room. Most of the people were probably around 27 or so. There were even some people who have grandchildren. I have to get up and work hard I guess. I just have to stay focused.

I have gotten all but one of my books. I am just waiting for that one now. I won the auction off ebay for it a few days ago, but the paypal is taking a few days to actually get the funds sent over to the guy. I will have to check it again later to see if it went through today or not. It was supposed to be done today. I also won an auction for a supposed rainforest scented Yankee Candle. If you remember Rainforest is my favorite scent, followed closely by China Sea. I like Woodland Spring a lot too, which is discontinued.

I am working a lot some weeks and not a lot others� Last week for example I worked 5 days, this week I work 4, next week I work 5 or 6, the following week I work 3. I really just want to get on a set schedule and work 4 days a week. Having a set schedule will be helpful for budgeting my time between school, work, and what little personal time I have. Well I have a lot of personal time at the moment, but that will change suddenly next Thursday when I start to have reading assignments due.

So the place where I live isn�t any better, but it looks as if it will get better. Richard IS moving out and it will be probably towards the end of the month. Jane IS getting a job starting mid September, or early October. Jane WILL get a new fridge once her job starts. IF she doesn�t I will be taking action to get it done. I have the e-mail I sent her, and she sent me, so I have proof of the conversation. Jane got stuff to get rid of the mouse that might still be in the house� That little fucker ate all my crackers.

I am glad Richard is moving out. I just don�t like being around him. It will probably be more quiet when he leaves. Most of the time when I�m in the room, I don�t have music going. I don�t know why I don�t turn on music, I just think it is because I like everything quiet. Though at night when I have my room open for air circulation, I put my headphones on so Richard can�t talk to me, or if he doesn�t I just don�t respond. Lately he has been being a baby about moving� like saying �this dryer sucks, I�m glad I�m moving�� just stuff like that. He�s moving back in with his mom� He should be saying �Why do I act like such an asshole, now I have to go live with my mom.�

A few days ago my jaw hurt so bad from grinding. I couldn�t even eat. I was really really depressed. I made a tombstone pizza, and usually I eat most of it, but I only could eat 3 pieces. It hurt too much to chew the hard crust, and my stomach just didn�t want me to eat. I am feeling better today though. My jaw still hurts, but not as much. It should be better in a few days. I am wearing my grinding guard the past few days at night. I wasn�t usually wearing it since I wasn�t needing it.

SO it is my birthday in 5 days. I�m going to be 23. I have no plans. I am probably going to open a bottle of wine and drink it all by myself, and watch movies. I talked with that Kendra girl from CSU. I�m going to e-mail her to see if she wants to have coffee. I actually did see her the other day. I was driving to work, and I was at a stop light and she crossed the street. Well I�m 90% sure that was her. It would have been the right area.

So Suji got me my B-day present already. I got the first two Zits comic books, and Sling Blade on DVD. I was so happy. I love the Zits comics so much. I miss reading them in the news paper. I have been reading the first one only when I�m at work. I haven�t gotten a chance to watch Sling Blade yet. I have wanted this movie for such a long time. Maybe the will be one of the movies I watch on September 6th.

I have been watching Twin Peaks. I just finished Season one last night, and started season two. Season two is so far weirder than the first. But I think it will be awesome. I�m going to watch a few in a little bit. I just have to get my laundry finished. It is almost done� I checked to make sure I will have food for the weekend, and I do. I am going to put off calling the State Farm guy again� I just need to get renters insurance and see if it is still ok that I have Colorado insurance for my car. One reason I am putting it off is I just don�t feel like leaving the house. Not that it is a bad thing, I just don�t want to drive.

Well� I have a really big craving to play Kessen 3 for so reason. It has been a while since I have played. I haven�t finished Jade Empire yet� the last time I played the power went out. I don�t know how close I am to the end� I might just play that and finish the game, and then move onto something else.

For the record� My birthday is really really soon
Off the record� I haven�t gotten any cards or presents other than from Suji�
For the record� I�m still not that happy about being here
Off the record� I wish someone would come here!

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